1 00:01:13,760 --> 00:01:15,831 Well, I still say all men are animals. 2 00:01:15,896 --> 00:01:19,537 All they ever wanted was my body. 3 00:01:19,599 --> 00:01:24,014 I used to be a slave to a padded bra, but no more. This is it. 4 00:01:25,105 --> 00:01:27,711 Take it or leave it. 5 00:01:27,774 --> 00:01:30,914 Oh, am I embarrassing you, Dr. Hartley? 6 00:01:30,977 --> 00:01:34,652 N-No, Michelle. It's good to get those things off- off your, uh- 7 00:01:36,950 --> 00:01:38,896 off your mind. 8 00:01:38,952 --> 00:01:42,559 That's what these consciousness-raising sessions are all about. 9 00:01:42,622 --> 00:01:45,569 I think now might be a good time for you tojust... 10 00:01:45,625 --> 00:01:47,536 take a look at yourselves as individuals. 11 00:01:47,594 --> 00:01:49,904 - Tell Chuck that. - Who's Chuck? 12 00:01:49,963 --> 00:01:53,376 He's my husband. My home is his castle. 13 00:01:53,433 --> 00:01:56,346 We both havejobs, but I do everything. 14 00:01:56,403 --> 00:01:58,383 [Scoffs] Typical, that's typical. 15 00:01:58,438 --> 00:02:01,442 And you resent Chuck for not helping with the housework? 16 00:02:01,508 --> 00:02:03,488 Well, yes. I'd like some time off too. 17 00:02:03,543 --> 00:02:07,992 Well, take it. I mean, take one clay off tojust do whatever you want. 18 00:02:08,048 --> 00:02:10,255 Uh, for example, Thursdays. 19 00:02:10,317 --> 00:02:14,766 Oh, but Thursday's Chuck's poker game, and I have to whip up the dip and drinks and stuff. 20 00:02:14,821 --> 00:02:16,494 Typical, that's typical. 21 00:02:16,556 --> 00:02:18,593 Tell Chuck to whip his own dip. 22 00:02:20,660 --> 00:02:24,301 No, the point is, you're entitled to one day off too, Adele. 23 00:02:24,364 --> 00:02:28,335 - I mean,you-you all are. - Didn't I tell you he was wonderful? 24 00:02:28,401 --> 00:02:31,848 - And you'd love his wife. She's wonderful too. - Oh, I'd like to meet her. 25 00:02:31,905 --> 00:02:35,580 Why don't you bring her to our next session, Dr. Hartley? 26 00:02:35,642 --> 00:02:37,588 Well, I don't really thinkl should. 27 00:02:37,644 --> 00:02:39,920 But maybe she could help by setting an example. 28 00:02:39,980 --> 00:02:41,926 I don't think she even wears a girdle. 29 00:02:41,982 --> 00:02:43,928 Well, l-l'll ask her. 30 00:02:43,984 --> 00:02:48,160 I mean, I'll ask her ifshe wants to- to come to the next session. 31 00:02:48,221 --> 00:02:51,327 But I'm afraid our time is up. 32 00:02:51,391 --> 00:02:56,204 Oh, Dr. Hartley. Can I use your phone? I want to call my beauty shop. 33 00:02:56,263 --> 00:02:58,539 No more teasing. No more hairspray. 34 00:02:58,598 --> 00:03:01,841 I'm gonna be natural. I'm gonna be me. 35 00:03:01,902 --> 00:03:05,349 - GoodJoan. - I'm gonna order a wig. 36 00:03:06,673 --> 00:03:08,778 Thanks again, Dr. Hartley. 37 00:03:08,842 --> 00:03:10,879 Well, I should thank you for letting me in the group. 38 00:03:10,944 --> 00:03:12,946 Men usually aren't allowed in sessions like that. 39 00:03:13,013 --> 00:03:17,223 - Oh, we don't think of you as a man. - You're better than that. 40 00:03:17,284 --> 00:03:22,029 - Carol, where you been? My coffee's getting cold. - Good, so are your doughnuts. 41 00:03:22,088 --> 00:03:26,400 You knowJerry, I am getting pretty tired of schlepping down to that doughnut shop... 42 00:03:26,459 --> 00:03:29,963 every time your little tummy says, “Feed me. Feed me." 43 00:03:30,030 --> 00:03:34,376 - What's a girl to do? - Uh, womanJerry. She's a woman. 44 00:03:34,434 --> 00:03:36,778 Oh, yeah. 45 00:03:36,836 --> 00:03:39,976 These are delicious, Carol. Thanks a lot. You're a doll. 46 00:03:40,040 --> 00:03:43,544 Womamjerry. lam a woman. 47 00:03:43,610 --> 00:03:45,647 Don't sit down! There's powdered sugar all over your seat. 48 00:03:45,712 --> 00:03:48,158 Well, I'm so glad I wore a dark skirt. 49 00:03:48,214 --> 00:03:51,718 I'll get it off for you. Come on, just- Turn aroundjust relax. 50 00:03:51,785 --> 00:03:54,766 - Gently. - Relax. 51 00:03:56,323 --> 00:03:59,031 Typical. That's typical. 52 00:04:08,068 --> 00:04:10,708 Oh, hi, Bob. Sorry I'm late... 53 00:04:10,770 --> 00:04:13,273 but I had a conference after school and I had to stop... 54 00:04:13,340 --> 00:04:15,286 and get the cleaning and pick up some groceries. 55 00:04:15,342 --> 00:04:18,687 - Dinner will be a little late. - That's all right, honey. I had a big lunch. 56 00:04:18,745 --> 00:04:22,090 - 0h, good - So I'll fix myself another ice tea and keep you company. 57 00:04:22,148 --> 00:04:24,025 - How was your day? - Great. 58 00:04:24,084 --> 00:04:27,361 Great, I had my consciousness-raising group today. 59 00:04:27,420 --> 00:04:30,890 - And the women are really feeling good about themselves. - Oh. 60 00:04:32,726 --> 00:04:35,002 - Is there a trick to this? - Yeah. 61 00:04:38,164 --> 00:04:40,110 Thanks. 62 00:04:42,268 --> 00:04:45,306 Yeah, they're, uh- they're learning quite a lot and so am I. 63 00:04:45,372 --> 00:04:49,081 Do you know they have panty hose with tummy control now? 64 00:04:50,810 --> 00:04:54,952 I did, dear. Uh, could you start the coals? I thought we'd barbecue tonight. 65 00:04:55,015 --> 00:04:57,962 Yeah, sure. You know, this is a perfect example... 66 00:04:58,018 --> 00:05:00,089 of what we were talking about today in the group. 67 00:05:00,153 --> 00:05:02,258 You know, sharing work. 68 00:05:02,322 --> 00:05:04,427 I mean, why should you have to do everything, you know? 69 00:05:09,229 --> 00:05:12,403 You know, I wish they'd come out with a barbecue apron that didn't have writing on it. 70 00:05:12,465 --> 00:05:15,446 Would you have preferred the one that says, “Boy Meets Grill“? 71 00:05:18,738 --> 00:05:21,651 - Where are the charcoals? - Right there. 72 00:05:21,708 --> 00:05:23,881 I can't see them. 73 00:05:29,416 --> 00:05:31,760 If they were a snake, they would've bit me. 74 00:05:31,818 --> 00:05:33,764 - [ Doorbell Buzzing] - Com e in. 75 00:05:35,255 --> 00:05:37,201 [Laughing] 76 00:05:39,492 --> 00:05:42,564 What does that say? “King of the Roast“? 77 00:05:42,629 --> 00:05:45,200 Oh, that's funny. It's the funniest thing I've ever seen. They, uh... 78 00:05:45,265 --> 00:05:47,404 they misspelled “road? 79 00:05:49,836 --> 00:05:52,373 - Howard. - Uh, can I borrow your sewing kit? 80 00:05:52,439 --> 00:05:55,045 - I thought you had one of those little pocket sewing kits. - Well, I did. 81 00:05:55,108 --> 00:05:57,554 I gave it to an Algerian pilot. He ripped his burnoose. 82 00:05:57,610 --> 00:05:59,556 Oh. 83 00:05:59,612 --> 00:06:02,286 - Here you go, Howard. - Thank you. 84 00:06:02,348 --> 00:06:05,886 Anyway, I really want to tell you what happened in the group today. 85 00:06:05,952 --> 00:06:09,695 We started talking about you and how we do things together. 86 00:06:11,357 --> 00:06:14,201 - Where's the starter fluid? - Right here. 87 00:06:15,862 --> 00:06:18,138 Oh. 88 00:06:18,198 --> 00:06:22,544 - And, uh, they said they'd really like to meet you. - Me? 89 00:06:22,602 --> 00:06:26,550 Yeah, they thought you could come down and they'd learn a lot about us- about our marriage. 90 00:06:26,606 --> 00:06:28,552 Oh, Bob, I don't wanna make them uncomfortable. 91 00:06:28,608 --> 00:06:31,555 Besides, you can't analyze a marriage. ltjust works. 92 00:06:31,611 --> 00:06:33,557 Or it doesn't, like mine. 93 00:06:33,613 --> 00:06:37,186 I always got the feeling that, well, Lois never liked doing things for me. 94 00:06:37,250 --> 00:06:39,389 Howard, that isn't what marriage is all about. 95 00:06:39,452 --> 00:06:41,728 It's-lt's doing things for each other. 96 00:06:41,788 --> 00:06:43,734 Gee, that's beautiful, Bob. 97 00:06:45,125 --> 00:06:47,196 Emily, would you please thread this for me? 98 00:06:47,260 --> 00:06:49,206 - Oh, sure, Howard. - Thank you 99 00:06:50,497 --> 00:06:52,773 Howard,you gonna want me to pull it through? 100 00:06:52,832 --> 00:06:56,507 - No, no, no. I like doing that myself. - Okay. 101 00:06:56,569 --> 00:06:58,515 - There we are. Thank you. - Got it? 102 00:07:03,843 --> 00:07:05,789 You didn't knot it. 103 00:07:06,913 --> 00:07:08,859 Do you have a black Magic Marker? 104 00:07:08,915 --> 00:07:10,861 I think so. 105 00:07:10,917 --> 00:07:13,557 - Got matches? - Here you go, Bob. 106 00:07:13,620 --> 00:07:16,863 - Howard. - Thank you. 107 00:07:24,197 --> 00:07:26,438 - What are you guys having tonight? - We're having hamburger. 108 00:07:26,499 --> 00:07:28,945 Would you like to- 109 00:07:29,002 --> 00:07:32,313 Oh, no. Bob. 110 00:07:32,372 --> 00:07:34,318 I forgot to buy hamburger meat. 111 00:07:34,374 --> 00:07:38,117 That's too bad. 112 00:07:38,178 --> 00:07:40,249 Look, I thinkl have some hamburger in my refrigerator. 113 00:07:40,313 --> 00:07:43,522 Oh, do you, Howard? That would be a big help. 114 00:07:43,583 --> 00:07:46,689 - Here are the keys. - Thanks. 115 00:07:46,753 --> 00:07:50,428 Uh, while you're over there, would you take my turkey out of the freezer to thaw? 116 00:07:54,427 --> 00:07:56,668 Ta-da. Ladies and Bob, your guest of honor. 117 00:07:56,729 --> 00:07:59,642 Oh, come in, Mrs. Hartley. Carol, why don't you stay too? 118 00:07:59,699 --> 00:08:03,772 Oh, Michelle, I'd like to, but I'm really needed out there. 119 00:08:03,836 --> 00:08:07,249 You'll never know when I have to make my next doughnut run. 120 00:08:07,307 --> 00:08:10,413 Well, this- this is my wife. 121 00:08:10,476 --> 00:08:13,719 - Hello. - Oh, Dr. Hartley, she's more than just a wife. 122 00:08:13,780 --> 00:08:18,957 [Clears Throat] Sisters, Emily Hartley is a dedicated educator. 123 00:08:19,018 --> 00:08:23,524 An equal partner in a union between two consenting adults. 124 00:08:23,590 --> 00:08:26,537 Bright, capable, warm, loving- 125 00:08:26,593 --> 00:08:30,040 a terrific woman. 126 00:08:30,096 --> 00:08:32,542 May I have the envelope, please? 127 00:08:32,599 --> 00:08:35,876 You know, this is really very embarrassing. 128 00:08:35,935 --> 00:08:38,006 - Uh, honey, this isjoan, Adele- - Oh, hello. 129 00:08:38,071 --> 00:08:40,017 - And that's Mrs. Cowens. - How do you do? Hi. 130 00:08:40,073 --> 00:08:41,984 See? That's the body I used to have. 131 00:08:42,041 --> 00:08:44,544 Oh, thank you... 132 00:08:44,611 --> 00:08:47,888 -I think. -[Clears Throat] 133 00:08:47,947 --> 00:08:51,292 Well, uh, sisters... 134 00:08:52,619 --> 00:08:55,566 what-what was your last week like? 135 00:08:55,622 --> 00:09:00,037 Oh, terrific. I finally met a man who wasn't after my flesh. 136 00:09:01,027 --> 00:09:03,303 He just came to the door, smiled... 137 00:09:03,363 --> 00:09:06,537 I signed for the package, and he left. 138 00:09:06,599 --> 00:09:09,273 Why are we talking about ourselves? 139 00:09:09,335 --> 00:09:14,512 - We have a guest speaker today. - Oh, no. No, I'm just enjoying listening to all of you. 140 00:09:14,574 --> 00:09:17,077 We didn't invite you here to enjoy yourself. 141 00:09:19,579 --> 00:09:23,083 We want to know why you enjoy yourself. 142 00:09:23,149 --> 00:09:25,595 Well, I enjoy a lot of different things. 143 00:09:25,652 --> 00:09:31,102 I enjoy Bob, and Bob and I enjoy good restaurants, movies, books. 144 00:09:31,157 --> 00:09:32,932 They do everything together. 145 00:09:32,992 --> 00:09:35,529 Well, we don't read the same book at the same time. 146 00:09:36,663 --> 00:09:38,734 - And we like to travel a lot. - That'; r/ght. 147 00:09:38,798 --> 00:09:41,301 Last year, Dr. Hartley took five days off. 148 00:09:41,367 --> 00:09:45,713 And he and Mrs. Hartley went to a psychologist's golf tournament in Akron, Ohio. 149 00:09:45,772 --> 00:09:49,276 Now I know how you keep your shape. You play golf. 150 00:09:49,342 --> 00:09:53,188 Oh, no, I don't play. I just kind of ride around in the cart. 151 00:09:53,246 --> 00:09:55,192 Oh? 152 00:09:55,248 --> 00:09:57,194 But we were together. 153 00:09:57,250 --> 00:09:59,753 Yeah, and it's a lot of fun, you know, 'cause at night when the men play poker... 154 00:09:59,819 --> 00:10:01,765 I got to meet a lot of terrific women. 155 00:10:01,821 --> 00:10:06,895 - Uh, where you gonna go next year? - Another golf tournament. 156 00:10:06,959 --> 00:10:08,939 This one's in Miami. 157 00:10:08,995 --> 00:10:11,134 Oh, we are? I didn't know that. 158 00:10:12,532 --> 00:10:14,478 Well, I guess I forgot to tell you. 159 00:10:14,534 --> 00:10:16,480 The newsletter came this past week. 160 00:10:16,536 --> 00:10:19,949 Typical. That's typical. 161 00:10:20,006 --> 00:10:22,247 Well, why don't we talk about this later? 162 00:10:22,308 --> 00:10:25,915 - That's what Chuck always says. - I think we should talk about this now. 163 00:10:25,978 --> 00:10:28,982 No, I think maybe we should talk about something else. 164 00:10:29,048 --> 00:10:33,554 Well, before we do, why don't we take a break? lf-lfthat's okay. 165 00:10:33,619 --> 00:10:36,725 Well, you're the boss. [Chuckles] 166 00:10:39,058 --> 00:10:41,265 Carol, would you come in, please? 167 00:10:45,264 --> 00:10:47,574 - Bob? - Yeah, I thought maybe some of the women... 168 00:10:47,633 --> 00:10:51,547 might want some, uh- some, uh, coffee... 169 00:10:51,604 --> 00:10:53,641 so I, uh... 170 00:10:53,706 --> 00:10:57,347 thought I'd see if you wanted some before I went to get it. 171 00:10:58,711 --> 00:11:00,850 To get it? 172 00:11:00,913 --> 00:11:03,985 - Well, why not? - Sure, Bob, absolutely. 173 00:11:04,050 --> 00:11:06,030 Do you know where the cream is? 174 00:11:09,989 --> 00:11:13,436 I don't know what's been going on in here, but keep it up. 175 00:11:13,493 --> 00:11:17,134 You know, I'm afraid I might have given you the wrong impression. 176 00:11:17,196 --> 00:11:20,439 'Cause I'm really very happy with my marriage and my life. 177 00:11:20,500 --> 00:11:24,312 But maybe Dr. Hartley has clouded your awareness with love. 178 00:11:24,370 --> 00:11:26,316 - And golf. - Typical. 179 00:11:26,372 --> 00:11:28,909 No, no, honestly, it's true. it's just that, you see- 180 00:11:28,975 --> 00:11:31,979 Well, Bob was 35 when we got married. And he'sjust- 181 00:11:32,044 --> 00:11:34,251 Well, he's used to doing things his own way. 182 00:11:34,313 --> 00:11:36,293 How old were you? 183 00:11:37,917 --> 00:11:40,329 Well, I was younger. 184 00:11:40,386 --> 00:11:43,993 And, uh- And I'm more flexible. 185 00:11:44,056 --> 00:11:46,002 You mean putty in his hands? 186 00:11:46,058 --> 00:11:49,039 No, no, that isn't what I mean. You see, what- 187 00:11:49,095 --> 00:11:51,200 Go on, Mrs. Hartley. You were saying? 188 00:11:51,264 --> 00:11:53,210 No, I think I've said enough for now. 189 00:11:53,266 --> 00:11:57,271 Well, if you can't talkwith your husband here, then we've got a problem. 190 00:11:57,336 --> 00:12:01,944 Well, if you can't talkwith me here, uh, maybe I-l shouldn't be here. 191 00:12:02,008 --> 00:12:03,954 L,uh- 192 00:12:04,010 --> 00:12:06,217 I can leave the room for a couple of minutes. 193 00:12:09,315 --> 00:12:14,162 Or, uh, more than a couple of minutes. 194 00:12:16,389 --> 00:12:18,995 You're, uh,you're kicking me out of the group, aren't you? 195 00:12:22,795 --> 00:12:25,605 Uh, we'll take the coffee. 196 00:12:41,247 --> 00:12:44,194 - Hi, honey. I'm home. - How come? 197 00:12:46,786 --> 00:12:48,732 Well, I live here. 198 00:12:48,788 --> 00:12:51,564 I wasn't expecting you for dinner. 199 00:12:51,624 --> 00:12:54,127 I have my group tonight and they're meeting here. 200 00:12:54,193 --> 00:12:58,266 That's right. I forgot. Well, I'll- I'll fix myself a sandwich. 201 00:12:58,331 --> 00:13:00,277 - Fl/make it for you. - No, honey, it's not necessary. 202 00:13:00,333 --> 00:13:03,678 In the last three weeks, I've learned where everything is in this kitchen. 203 00:13:03,736 --> 00:13:05,977 I even know where you keep that, uh, can of bacon grease. 204 00:13:07,139 --> 00:13:09,085 I just don't know why. 205 00:13:11,077 --> 00:13:15,583 Oh, I feel a little funny asking this, but, uh, what's new with my group? 206 00:13:15,648 --> 00:13:19,960 Oh, a lot. Michelle is really speaking up to her father. 207 00:13:20,019 --> 00:13:22,499 And Adele and Chuck are starting to communicate. 208 00:13:22,555 --> 00:13:25,468 - And Mrs. Cowens is firming up her thighs. - [Knock On Door] 209 00:13:25,525 --> 00:13:28,995 Oh, yeah. Andjoan is dating the United Parcel man. 210 00:13:29,061 --> 00:13:32,338 - Oh, hi, Howard. - Hi. Hi, Bob. 211 00:13:32,398 --> 00:13:36,471 - Hey, you guys have any Scotch Tape? - Why, did you ripyour pants? 212 00:13:36,536 --> 00:13:39,073 No, I want to wrap this gift. 213 00:13:39,138 --> 00:13:41,140 I think we have. Let me see. 214 00:13:41,207 --> 00:13:45,121 - Howard. - Ah, thank you. 215 00:13:45,177 --> 00:13:47,350 You doing anything for dinner tonight, Howard? 216 00:13:47,413 --> 00:13:51,452 I'm going to a stag party. That's what this is for. 217 00:13:51,517 --> 00:13:54,293 Good oldjim Dolan finally got caught. [Laughing] 218 00:13:56,689 --> 00:14:01,001 Uh, Howard, if I were you, I wouldn't say anything like that around here. 219 00:14:01,060 --> 00:14:04,735 Oh, don't get me wrong. She's a terrific-looking gal. 220 00:14:04,797 --> 00:14:06,743 She'll makejim a nice home. 221 00:14:06,799 --> 00:14:09,211 [Doorbell Buzzing] 222 00:14:09,268 --> 00:14:12,715 Howard, if I were you, I wouldn't say anything for the next couple of minutes. 223 00:14:12,772 --> 00:14:14,945 - Hi. - Hi. Oh,you look wonderful. 224 00:14:15,007 --> 00:14:17,851 - Hi,joan. - Oh, hi, Dr. Hartley. 225 00:14:19,345 --> 00:14:22,383 - Hi, Michelle. I've never seen you in a dress before. - I know. 226 00:14:22,448 --> 00:14:25,554 It's the first time my legs have been out since I was 10. 227 00:14:25,618 --> 00:14:28,827 And I'm not wearing a girdle. I feel loose as a goose. 228 00:14:28,888 --> 00:14:31,630 Well, I'd better get my coat. It must be windy out. 229 00:14:32,658 --> 00:14:35,002 Loan. 230 00:14:35,061 --> 00:14:39,908 - You just look so natural. - [Chuckles] And I never felt better. 231 00:14:39,966 --> 00:14:44,437 I mean, I discovered I don't have to flaunt it to be attractive... 232 00:14:44,503 --> 00:14:47,507 if you know what I mean. [Giggles] 233 00:14:47,573 --> 00:14:49,575 No. 234 00:14:51,477 --> 00:14:53,821 You look very nice,joan. You all look very nice. 235 00:14:53,879 --> 00:14:56,382 - Excuse me, please. - Wonderful. 236 00:14:58,050 --> 00:15:02,192 Howard, these women are all part of my consciousness-raising group. 237 00:15:02,254 --> 00:15:05,792 Oh, well that sounds like a good cause. I hope you raise a lot. 238 00:15:07,560 --> 00:15:09,506 That's it, Howard. Let's go. 239 00:15:09,562 --> 00:15:12,065 No, no, really. I'll throw in a couple of bucks. 240 00:15:13,065 --> 00:15:15,511 Uh, Bob. where will you be? 241 00:15:15,568 --> 00:15:20,677 Oh, I don't know. I thought maybe I'd go down by the lake in the dark and, uh... 242 00:15:22,108 --> 00:15:24,748 have my liverwurst sandwich. 243 00:15:33,085 --> 00:15:35,122 Doorbell Buzzes 1 244 00:15:38,124 --> 00:15:40,365 Hey, Bob. What are you doing here? 245 00:15:40,426 --> 00:15:42,633 Jerry, can't a friend stop by to see another friend? 246 00:15:42,695 --> 00:15:45,938 Sure. 247 00:15:45,998 --> 00:15:48,171 Aw, come on in. 248 00:15:48,234 --> 00:15:51,306 You, uh, you want a drink? 249 00:15:51,370 --> 00:15:54,874 - Well, I was kind of hoping we could have dinnenjerry. - I already ate. 250 00:15:56,542 --> 00:15:58,613 Well, maybe I'll take you up on that drink. 251 00:15:58,678 --> 00:16:01,557 - What goes well with liverwurst? - Nothing. 252 00:16:01,614 --> 00:16:03,560 Well, go ahead. See what you can find. 253 00:16:03,616 --> 00:16:06,222 I was just straightening up. 254 00:16:06,285 --> 00:16:08,424 I got a date coming over in a few minutes. 255 00:16:10,156 --> 00:16:12,898 - She's coming over here? - Yeah. 256 00:16:12,958 --> 00:16:15,165 She can drive, read addresses. Why not? 257 00:16:17,530 --> 00:16:21,637 - Oh. - I mean, my generation doesn't stand on formalities anymore. 258 00:16:21,701 --> 00:16:25,649 Jerry, what do you mean, your generation? I'm only six years older than you are. 259 00:16:25,705 --> 00:16:28,083 Those are six very important years, Bob. 260 00:16:28,140 --> 00:16:30,086 Those are the wonder years. 261 00:16:32,545 --> 00:16:34,491 Oh, listen, don't sit on the couch. 262 00:16:34,547 --> 00:16:36,788 The pillows have just been “poof ed? 263 00:16:38,617 --> 00:16:42,997 UhJerry, you know that consciousness-raising group that I started? 264 00:16:43,055 --> 00:16:46,195 - Yeah. - Well, it, uh, it just hasn't worked out. 265 00:16:46,258 --> 00:16:49,330 - Oh, yeah? - I've always considered women as equals. 266 00:16:49,395 --> 00:16:51,534 [Scoffs] Times have changed. 267 00:16:51,597 --> 00:16:53,543 Yeah, I know. 268 00:16:53,599 --> 00:16:58,014 You know, more and more of my female patients are going to women psychologists. 269 00:16:58,070 --> 00:17:00,311 I mean, all my appointments are men. 270 00:17:00,372 --> 00:17:03,979 You know, I haven't had a woman in a week and a half. 271 00:17:07,446 --> 00:17:11,724 A week and a half. I could tell you a story that would make you cry. 272 00:17:11,784 --> 00:17:14,458 Doorbell Buzzes 1 273 00:17:14,520 --> 00:17:16,466 But my luck could change any minute. 274 00:17:20,359 --> 00:17:22,305 Ingrid. 275 00:17:22,361 --> 00:17:25,205 Bob, this is Ingrid BjCirn-Bjtirk. 276 00:17:25,264 --> 00:17:28,074 Ingrid, I'd like you to meet my good friend, Bob Hartley. 277 00:17:28,134 --> 00:17:30,341 Glad to meet you. 278 00:17:30,402 --> 00:17:33,383 - Nice to meet you, Miss Bjtirk. - No, it's BjCirn-Bjtirk. 279 00:17:33,439 --> 00:17:37,251 There's a... thing and a couple of... over her “O“s. 280 00:17:38,511 --> 00:17:42,891 Uh, how long have you andjerry known each other? 281 00:17:42,948 --> 00:17:45,053 Glad to meet you. 282 00:17:45,117 --> 00:17:47,063 She, uh, doesn't understand English, Bob. 283 00:17:49,588 --> 00:17:52,501 Well, have a- have a great eveningJerry. 284 00:17:52,558 --> 00:17:55,596 I know you have a lot to talk about. 285 00:17:57,930 --> 00:18:01,002 - Right, Ingrid? - Glad to meet you. 286 00:18:01,066 --> 00:18:04,047 I knew you were gonna say that. 287 00:18:30,329 --> 00:18:32,275 Bob, is that you? 288 00:18:32,331 --> 00:18:34,504 Yeah, honey. just stay where you are. 289 00:18:53,552 --> 00:18:55,589 [flattering] 290 00:18:55,654 --> 00:18:58,328 Bob, are you all right? 291 00:18:58,390 --> 00:19:00,893 Perfect, honey. Everything's under control. 292 00:19:21,413 --> 00:19:24,690 [Dishes Clattering] 293 00:19:26,085 --> 00:19:28,031 Bob, what is going on in here? 294 00:19:28,087 --> 00:19:31,330 Don't worry, honey. just stay in bed. 295 00:19:35,094 --> 00:19:38,303 Couldn't sleep, huh? 296 00:19:38,364 --> 00:19:42,369 Bob, it's 2:00 in the morning. I was worried about you. 297 00:19:42,434 --> 00:19:45,176 Yeah, I know. I know exactly what you're thinking. 298 00:19:45,237 --> 00:19:48,878 You're thinking that I was out carousing with the guys, right? 299 00:19:50,743 --> 00:19:54,691 Well, I was out, uh, carousing alone. 300 00:19:54,747 --> 00:19:57,489 I think I'll make some coffee, huh? 301 00:19:57,549 --> 00:20:01,361 - Well, I'm gonna have some pizza. - Bob, didn't you have anything to eat all night? 302 00:20:01,420 --> 00:20:05,926 I had some, uh, some olives at Guidds. 303 00:20:05,991 --> 00:20:08,835 - Guido? - Guido made the pizza. 304 00:20:08,894 --> 00:20:10,567 Oh. 305 00:20:10,629 --> 00:20:13,235 Pizza is Guido's life. 306 00:20:15,868 --> 00:20:19,213 Guido taught me what antipasto means. 307 00:20:19,271 --> 00:20:21,182 What does it mean, Bob? 308 00:20:22,241 --> 00:20:24,380 Against “paste? 309 00:20:30,382 --> 00:20:34,853 By-By the same token, provolone means: in favor of“volone.“ 310 00:20:34,920 --> 00:20:36,866 [Laughing] 311 00:20:39,892 --> 00:20:44,568 Uh, Bob, don't you think you should use a bigger cookie sheet? 312 00:20:45,597 --> 00:20:48,942 This, uh, this will be fine. 313 00:21:00,612 --> 00:21:04,287 Yeah, you did that real well, Bob. 314 00:21:04,350 --> 00:21:06,694 Uh, Emily, I want to, uh- 315 00:21:06,752 --> 00:21:10,598 I want to say something, so I'm, uh... 316 00:21:10,656 --> 00:21:12,966 I'm just gonna say it. 317 00:21:16,895 --> 00:21:18,875 Well, say it, Bob. 318 00:21:18,931 --> 00:21:21,434 What? 319 00:21:21,500 --> 00:21:23,537 Oh. 320 00:21:23,602 --> 00:21:28,176 I always thought that we had a great marriage... 321 00:21:28,240 --> 00:21:32,586 until I found out that it was, uh, typical. 322 00:21:32,644 --> 00:21:34,920 Oh, Bob. It's not typical. 323 00:21:34,980 --> 00:21:37,586 Well, it's not 50-50. 324 00:21:37,649 --> 00:21:40,755 Well, a marriage doesn't have to be 50-50 all the time. 325 00:21:40,819 --> 00:21:43,493 It should just average out to 50-50. 326 00:21:43,555 --> 00:21:46,729 Ours is more like 80-50. 327 00:21:48,861 --> 00:21:51,535 Bob, Bob, why don't you sit down? 328 00:21:51,597 --> 00:21:54,669 I'd love to. 329 00:21:54,733 --> 00:21:58,840 You know, I was thinking about something tonight whenjoan was talking about her hair. 330 00:21:58,904 --> 00:22:00,941 Emily, don't do anything to your hair. 331 00:22:01,006 --> 00:22:05,148 She looks like she was electrocuted. 332 00:22:05,210 --> 00:22:10,717 L-I was thinking about when I was a little girl growing up in Seattle, you know. 333 00:22:10,783 --> 00:22:13,389 And every summer, my father used to take me white-water canoeing. 334 00:22:13,452 --> 00:22:16,865 And it was really exciting, you know, shooting the rapids... 335 00:22:16,922 --> 00:22:22,838 the canoe pitching and tossing and rocking and rolling, sometimes almost capsizing- 336 00:22:22,895 --> 00:22:27,776 Emily, could we get through the rapids a little quicker? 337 00:22:27,833 --> 00:22:30,439 I'm sorry, honey. 338 00:22:30,502 --> 00:22:34,382 Well, you see, the summer that I turned 12... 339 00:22:34,440 --> 00:22:36,545 my father sat me down and he said... 340 00:22:36,608 --> 00:22:41,455 “Emilyjoyce, you're not gonna go canoeing anymore. 341 00:22:41,513 --> 00:22:45,518 I mean, you're a young lady now and you should be doing more feminine things.“ 342 00:22:45,584 --> 00:22:48,087 So my mother enrolled me in a ballroom dancing class... 343 00:22:48,153 --> 00:22:53,364 and she dressed me up in a white pinafore and white cotton gloves and Maryjanes. 344 00:22:53,425 --> 00:22:56,634 And I never went canoeing again. 345 00:22:56,695 --> 00:22:58,902 Bob, I want to go canoeing. 346 00:23:01,767 --> 00:23:04,907 Oh, I get it. 347 00:23:04,970 --> 00:23:08,008 You want to go canoeing. 348 00:23:08,073 --> 00:23:11,680 Yeah, and it's not just that. I mean, there are other things that I want to do... 349 00:23:11,743 --> 00:23:13,689 that I don't do 'cause you don't want to. 350 00:23:14,847 --> 00:23:17,259 Well, we'll just- we'll go canoeing. 351 00:23:18,250 --> 00:23:20,526 Well, I wasn't thinking we, Bob. 352 00:23:20,586 --> 00:23:23,931 - F m gazing with A de/e and/oan. - O h. 353 00:23:23,989 --> 00:23:25,832 Is that okay, Bob? 354 00:23:25,891 --> 00:23:28,371 Well, it's okay with me... 355 00:23:28,427 --> 00:23:32,898 if it's all right with Chuck and the United Parcel man. 356 00:23:32,965 --> 00:23:36,538 You'll get a chance to ask them next week. The men are invited to our session. 357 00:23:36,602 --> 00:23:38,604 Me too? 358 00:23:38,670 --> 00:23:40,946 Yeah, you too, Bob. 359 00:23:42,774 --> 00:23:46,153 Well, I'll try to, uh... 360 00:23:46,211 --> 00:23:48,350 try to squeeze it in, Emilyjoyce. 361 00:23:48,413 --> 00:23:52,520 - [ Timer D/ngs] - Oh, there's your pizza. I'll get it. 362 00:23:53,952 --> 00:23:58,059 Bob, where's the big spatula? Have you seen it? 363 00:23:58,123 --> 00:24:01,400 Yeah, I've seen it. 364 00:24:01,460 --> 00:24:06,068 - Well, where is it? - Wouldn't you like to know? 365 00:24:12,738 --> 00:24:14,684 Okay, now, you're sure you've got everything? 366 00:24:14,740 --> 00:24:18,620 Life preserver, air mattress, toothbrush, flashlight, mosquito repellent, suntan oil. 367 00:24:18,677 --> 00:24:20,884 Honey, we went over that 19 times. 368 00:24:20,946 --> 00:24:23,790 Well, honey, I just want to make sure you're gonna be okay. 369 00:24:23,849 --> 00:24:27,820 Don't worry. I'll call you as soon as I get to the landing. 370 00:24:27,886 --> 00:24:30,059 Oh, a dime. You're gonna need a dime to call. 371 00:24:30,122 --> 00:24:34,332 No, I've got a dime. Bob, I'm gonna be all right. 372 00:24:34,393 --> 00:24:36,339 - Okay. - Honey, are you gonna be all right? 373 00:24:36,395 --> 00:24:40,104 I'm gonna be fine. Watch a little television, read some books. 374 00:24:40,165 --> 00:24:42,338 I may start a new can of bacon grease. 375 00:24:43,869 --> 00:24:47,510 I'll bejust fine, hon. I want you to go and have a good time. 376 00:24:51,677 --> 00:24:54,419 Oh, uh- 377 00:24:54,479 --> 00:24:56,652 Where are the poker chips and the bourbon? 378 00:25:01,720 --> 00:25:04,963 They're right next to the spatula. 379 00:25:38,624 --> 00:25:40,399 [ Mews]